David Comedy Skit

Script Author: Johnathan Kirsch


Ben and Jen, two eccentric characters, are supposed to be doing a Bible Comedy show. But they can barely manage to hold an intelligible conversation. They end up telling some off the rails jokes about King David.

Puppets Needed

  • Boy Puppet: Ben
  • Girl Puppet: Jen


Jen: Hello!

Ben: Hi!

Jen: Hello!

Ben: Hi!

Jen: Hey! I wanted to get the last word in Ben!

Ben: Last word.

Jen: Humph.

Ben: Aren’t we supposed to be doing a comedy show Jen?

Jen: Uuuuuuu, yeah Ben. Bible comedy.

Ben: Let’s talk about King David!

Jen: You mean that madman?

Ben: Noooooo.

Jen: Well, when he was in the court of the Philistines he was acting like this.

Jen proceeds to act like a lunatic.

Ben: Oh yeah! That guy! He was the greatest babysitter in the bible.

Jen: Now you’re the lunatic, Ben.

Ben: No I’m not. He rocked Goliath to sleep.

Jen: You think you’re cocky! Well here’s one for you. If Goliath was still alive today would you tell him David was the greatest babysitter in the bible?

Ben: Probably, he might get a laugh out of it.

Jen: No, he wouldn’t, because he already fell for it once.

Ben: Hahaha! Wait, was David really a madman?

Jen: Ok… maybe I stretched that a little bit, he only acted like that to escape execution by the evil Philistines.

Ben: Where did he go after that?

Jen: He escaped to a cave.

Ben: He’s a hobbit too!? Hiding in holes!

Jen: What! No!

Ben: He’s a mentally disturbed, babysitting, hobbit?!?

Jen: No! He’s a respectable, after God’s own heart, brave king!

Ben: This conversation has gone off the wheels.

Jen: Wheels?

Ben: It sounds like rails…

Jen: Goodbye, sly guy.

Ben: Not too soon lemon spoon. Lagoon? Or was it indecipherable moons?

Jen: It’s baboon you baboon!

Ben: Fine, I’ll make one up Jen. Don’t fall off a precipice and die like evil queen Jezebel!

Jen: Ben!!!

This script is freely given (Matt. 10:8) for the sake of the gospel. You can copy, translate, modify, and distribute this script, without restriction, and without needing to ask permission.

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